BEAUTY IS IN THE EYES OF THE BEHOLDER
I have to let go
What was never mine
I wanted to be close
From far away
Didn’t dare
To stare at you
Too long
For it was a wrong longing
And I knew that
There is no right to be jealous
No right to miss
No right to interpret things
It’s just that I absorbed
Every single smile and every gaze
You gave
Me,
That I could easily
Repeat
every word
you said
And every joke you made
Why did you say nice things anyway
Why do you look nice
And sound nice
And smile
And talk
And walk
Nice?
Stunning…
Questions aren’t of any use
Because I have to release
thinking of you
stop wanting to think of you
stop forcing to want to think of you
sooner or later
everything drifts
away
and it’s not that
my heart aches
as much as before
but still I can choose
to awaken them
small box of
tiny treasures
I will open you once in a while
Containing tiny and
Meaningful pleasures
Invisible, almost
Most private
I cannot throw you away

(ju,
mai 2007)